Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Mom said you looked used
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
