you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
