in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
is it fun? or sober?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
