Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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