i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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