My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
