Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
