You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
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