We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Randomize
