i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
