ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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