White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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