i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
