Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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