how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
And then my night got REAL pukey
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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