Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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