his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
