god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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