32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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