did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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