windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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