Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
i think my cat just said my name.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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