ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
