No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
