If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
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All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
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I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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