We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
God, I missed his penis.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
