Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize