how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
