is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
