Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Dicks are not precious.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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