come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize