Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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