My nipple is on Facebook.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
