The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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