names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Everclear isn't food dammit
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize
