I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
