dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
