I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I wear drunk well.
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