"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
