After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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