only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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