u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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