So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
the night ended with taco bell and tears
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
