I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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