Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(949): View more from California

I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.

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(949): I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me. http://tfl.nu/kgtm

Replies (19) Good night (618) Bad night (2231)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.

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(608): i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross. http://tfl.nu/qmd2

Replies (19) Good night (589) Bad night (2872)
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(904): View more from Florida

He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".

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(904): He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator". http://tfl.nu/yo1x

Replies (59) Good night (1019) Bad night (5953)
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(913): View more from Kansas

some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.

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(913): some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night. http://tfl.nu/2xhx

Replies (18) Good night (9568) Bad night (783)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.

(1-203): View more from Connecticut

so yall hooked up?

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(203): I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone. (1-203): so yall hooked up? http://tfl.nu/j54f

Replies (19) Good night (5466) Bad night (1388)
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(502): View more from Kentucky

You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.

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(502): You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down. http://tfl.nu/88lm

Replies (4) Good night (997) Bad night (2161)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...

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(608): Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up... http://tfl.nu/7mfn

Replies (8) Good night (1109) Bad night (2469)
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(815): View more from Illinois

If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.

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(815): If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up. http://tfl.nu/63pe

Replies (3) Good night (2209) Bad night (826)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail

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(919): He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail http://tfl.nu/mc07

Replies (11) Good night (1031) Bad night (2260)
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(605): View more from South Dakota

When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots

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(605): When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots http://tfl.nu/ud2p

Replies (7) Good night (1293) Bad night (592)
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(734): View more from Michigan

my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW

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(734): my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW http://tfl.nu/rle5

Replies (4) Good night (874) Bad night (417)
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(425): View more from Washington

Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you

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(425): Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you http://tfl.nu/3zbf

Replies (2) Good night (691) Bad night (318)
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(810): View more from Michigan

I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.

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(810): I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP. http://tfl.nu/97xo

Replies (7) Good night (2422) Bad night (466)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard

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(973): Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard http://tfl.nu/5c0l

Replies (18) Good night (349) Bad night (2306)
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(44): View more from United Kingdom

I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud

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(44): I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud http://tfl.nu/s93d

Replies (7) Good night (842) Bad night (288)

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