I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.