that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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