so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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