do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
