Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
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Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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