I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
