Texts From Last Night

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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...

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  (502): if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings... http://tfl.nu/axpi
  Replies (16) Good night (3504) Bad night (698)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.

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  (770): I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter. http://tfl.nu/9rwz
  Replies (20) Good night (3723) Bad night (801)
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  (+44): View more from England

  Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,

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  (+44): Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work, http://tfl.nu/5a46
  Replies (48) Good night (917) Bad night (2508)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  **i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**

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  (972): **i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS** http://tfl.nu/fjtm
  Replies (58) Good night (1887) Bad night (4375)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...

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  (630): note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots... http://tfl.nu/3sut
  Replies (14) Good night (4553) Bad night (1466)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.

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  (630): I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong. http://tfl.nu/nqbt
  Replies (19) Good night (3959) Bad night (1535)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.

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  (432): Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know. http://tfl.nu/dusl
  Replies (5) Good night (1427) Bad night (2932)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .

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  (757): i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too . http://tfl.nu/0v5g
  Replies (26) Good night (1700) Bad night (3123)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.

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  (717): And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes. http://tfl.nu/hx7l
  Replies (10) Good night (908) Bad night (537)
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  (805): View more from California

  Is the party worth it?

  (512): View more from Texas

  I am drink. Beer pony and singing.

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  (805): Is the party worth it? (512): I am drink. Beer pony and singing. http://tfl.nu/lz1y
  Replies (2) Good night (1193) Bad night (437)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.

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  (317): Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it. http://tfl.nu/ks3m
  Replies (3) Good night (801) Bad night (417)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower

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  (508): I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower http://tfl.nu/2amr
  Replies (1) Good night (625) Bad night (304)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.

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  (419): Oh and yeah that does count as public urination. http://tfl.nu/7asx
  Replies (0) Good night (405) Bad night (400)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.

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  (307): Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen. http://tfl.nu/bs4y
  Replies (0) Good night (714) Bad night (223)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.

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  (734): I need a conscience and I need it yesterday. http://tfl.nu/vdkk
  Replies (0) Good night (328) Bad night (119)

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