I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
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As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
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Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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